Time to blog once more, now the Olympic buzz has worn off. I don't know how long you managed to keep that warm, fuzzy glow of British brilliance. If you had the misfortune to watch Olympic's closing ceremony then my guess is the time it took for George Michael to sing his new track. It might have worked if he'd really stuck to his new direction and crashed a sparkly taxi into one of the Spice Girls whilst smoking a joint so powerful its smoke trail can stone people in different postcodes. Seeing the set list, I decided to preserve my happy memories of the Olympic opening ceremony, the bright smiling faces of those winning Olympians - in particular Jade Jones and Laura Trott. Since when did sportswomen get so foxy ?
My post Games high lasted almost until the end of the week until I read an article which quoted leaked excerpts from a new book from the political right. Called 'Britain Unchained', it's the work of five young Tory MPs who have apparently concluded that the recession was caused by Britons's laziness and lack of productivity. The irony of being lectured on productivity by a quintet of politicians none of whom have ever worked in business, but instead come from those models of value-added industry like the law, academia and financial analysis is no doubt lost on them. I should add that the subtitle is 'Global Lessons for Growth and Prosperity',' which I'm assuming will focus on how we need to scrap those pesky health and safety laws that hold back British business from achieving its potential, like BP did in the Gulf of Mexico. Or something.
There's me thinking the recession might possibly have had something to do with financial deregulation and a dysfunctional banking system. But they're probably right, the recession was almost certainly caused by too many people looking at Facebook during work time. (On that note, what happens if you work for Facebook and during your working day you spend hours on your own personal Facebook page. Would you get a formal warning? No, it would probably be an Unlike).
You'll notice that we are more than halfway through the blog and I still haven't mentioned business rates. That's the problem with any form of taxation, as soon as you mention it, people's eyes glaze over or if you're Jimmy Carr, you make a hurried public apology. Start a conversation about local tax rates and you will be most likely be greeted by a pained expression, much like my wife assumes when I try to explain to her strictly speaking the human and cylons' battles should be silent as sound cannot travel in the vacuum of deep space. Yet those cluster of Tory tosspots writing about a subject of which they have no direct experience, business, were trying at least to ask a useful question, how do we get the economy growing again?
Perhaps the first thing we could do is create a tax system that doesn't actively penalise small businesses. I'm fortunate enough to be running a growing enterprise that has now reached the point where we need proper commercial premises. So there's a risk involved with taking on lease, staff and our reward for this is that we get to pay Islington council about £10k. For which, in return we get absolutely nothing, seriously, you have to pay extra to get your bins taken away. Unlike Jimmy Carr, I believe it's a moral obligation to pay tax so it's the not principle of paying tax I mind, this is just the way it works. This is not a tax on profits or turnover, it's a tax on taking on the liability of a lease. If you wanted to create a process that actively discourages people from growing their business, then short of dumping a container load of dead dogs in their office every Monday, I can't think of a better way of killing off entrepreneurial drive. (Expect of course if you ran a niche business reselling dog carcasses).
This is not a sob story, incidentally, we're doing fine. I am simply gobsmacked at how self-defeating and idiotic business rates are in practise. There that's my Olympic Games happiness sorted out once and for all. Back to being a whinging Pom.
And if anyone from Islington council does read this, what exactly do we get for our 10K?
