2015 has not started the way many of us would have hoped and I'm not talking about resolutions to lay off booze that lasted three days into the working week until it was a colleague's leaving do and it would rude not to have had at least one drink or four and a round of shots. The terrible murders in France have shocked us all, but one word being banded around is perhaps something we could do without in 2015: respect. We should respect Muslim beliefs; we should respect freedom of speech. I'd suggest that a collective resolution for the new year should be to lay off the concept of respect altogether.
Think about when you use the word respect. When you say "with all due respect", what you really mean is you think the other person's opinions are ridiculous. "With respect" is another way of saying stop talking crap. Even the polite phrase "I respect your beliefs" really means I think you are mental but it would be socially unacceptable to tell you so to your face.
George Galloway's party is called Respect. This is man who took money from Saddam Hussein, allegedly for a charity foundation, which has never published accounts. When describing the sociopath who killed 100,00s of Kurds with poison gas, Galloway said he admired the dictator's courage.
Street gangs will assault or stab people over the failure to provide enough respect. Organised crime groups such as the Mafia have a habit of shooting one another for violating their peculiar code of respect. The IRA still doles out punishment beatings or knee-cappings if they feel they have been disrespected. These outfits are great source material for TV dramas and feature films, true. I'm re-watching the Sopranos which expertly plays with the viewer's emotions, making you sympathise with mob boss Tony at times. It's a tough job dealing with teenage children, an ageing mother and murdering informers. I feel his pain; I just don't respect him.
Fundamentalist Muslim groups and indeed more mainstream ones are ready to allege that their faith has been disrespected and demand that the rest of us show the proper "respect" for their beliefs. Why? Nobody has any inherent right to respect, nor does any group. Respect is something individuals earn through over their lifetime through their actions. You don't get an automatic right to respect because you believe something very strongly.
9/11 Truthers are adamant that the US government orchestrated the destruction of the Twin Towers. As long as no one ever puts one of them in a position of responsibility, that's fine. But those beliefs do not merit respect. Some of the truthers really do wear tin foil hats and live inside Faraday cages. They are to use the technical term batshit crazy.
You could argue I'm being very disrespectful comparing the religious beliefs of fundamentalist Muslims to those of conspiracy theorists. Except you cannot grant everyone or every idea respect, if they are mutually exclusive. Richard Dawkins and the Archbishop of Canterbury cannot both be right, especially as the new Archbishop actually believes in God. If you respect Dawkins's beliefs, you can't respect the Archbishop's and vice versa. The same holds true for any belief system, whether it's atheism or scientology unless you don't believe in anything at all, which is cheating.
When groups or individuals clamour for respect, it's not the same as tolerance or freedom. Doing the right thing in terms of people's beliefs in covered by the ancient philosophy expressed by Socrates, Buddha and Jesus, namely don't be a dick. Or as your grandmother might call it, good manners. Actually my grandmother is a bad example, as she was a borderline Nazi. For everyone else, with normal grandmothers who didn't think Norman Tebbit was dangerous liberal and hadn't visited Hitler's Germany in the 1930s, you get the idea. Be nice to people, don't be a dick (your own grandmother may have used a slightly different phrasing).
Anyone agitating for respect is really demanding that society change to accommodate their beliefs or behaviour. To which the correct response is, with respect, get lost. Equality legislation and laws on racial and religious discrimination have the situation pretty much covered ( though there's plenty of material for another blog). The interesting thing is that the individuals who most deserve respect in our society, those who devote their lives to the service of others are also the least likely to shout about needing respect. Odd that isn't it?
Now the observant of you may have noticed that in the opening paragraph, I used the phrase freedom of speech and implied that even that doesn't deserve respect. I was exaggerating for effect. Although someone excising their right to free speech is not entitled to respect by default. Lars von Trier can make a film where the characters remove their own genitals, I don't have to watch it and as it turns out, I haven't. You can if you want, that's the beauty of the free society.
Freedom of speech requires robust defence, not respect as if it were a local bye-law relating to parking zones or littering. Freedom should be championed, cherished and celebrated. The concept of respect is the refuge of bigots, bullies and bullshitters who want to extract concessions from the rest of us.
But what if you offend people or hurt their feelings by penning satirical cartoons, like Charlie Hebdo's team? Sadly in recent days, too many have rushed to blame the victims, as if freedom speech is a conditional principle, dependent on good behaviour. If a person believes in an Almighty deity with supreme power, then I'd argue that that deity can look after himself (or herself). Those who kill to right an alleged wrong against their faith cannot be appeased nor should they and don't above all deserve respect.
